Heroes Among Us

We are surronded by heroes. All we need to do is look around us. I wish that I could share a photo of everyone, because in some way we are all heroes. We are heroes to our children, our friends, our spouses, our co-workers, to random people. It doesn't matter who we are a hero to. Just remember your potential!

Let's look at Hugh Jackman, who professionally plays a super hero. His hero is his dad. Even Wolverine has a hero! 

 

Now let's look at Stan Lee. He is a millionaire from creating superheroes. He is the hero to others and yet here he is holding a sign that says he is for real life superheroes. Even the heroes need heroes!

 Let's not forget the biggest heroes of all. These men sacrifice their lives for our freedom. Their courage, selflessness, and honor make them real life heroes.

I created a survey asking college students and family members who their favorite hero/heroine was and what attributes their hero had that they admired. Below you will see the results of this survey. I was very surprised that Captain America was so popular. After asking the second part to the question, his popularity made sense. 

While some heroes were picked solely for their good looks, others were picked for their character. Some liked Thor because of his hammer. Others liked that Ironman is rich. But often, after describing these characteristics my fellow students began to delve deeper into their appreciation for their hero. A girl named Sydney stated, "I choose Charles Xavier because he is a great leader despite his physical limitations". Rochelle explained, "Ironman is smart, and he isn't afraid to give his opinion, and he tries even if he shows off a little bit. And he's attractive. BONUS- he listens to AC/DC". Finally, Harlee said, "my favorite hero would have to be the Hulk. I like that he realizes that he has flaws and yet he doesn't let those flaws define him. He tries his best to be a good person and help those around him."

We can learn so much from these heroes. That is what heroes are for, an example to look up to and to strive to be like. If only we could have the "good morals and goodness" about us that Rylee admires in Captain America. Being a hero doesn't require superhuman strength, cat-like reflexes, or mind-controlling abilities. It comes from within. Thor wouldn't be as amazing without his honor and worthiness to wield his hammer. Wonder Woman wouldn't be wonderful without her compassionate and good-hearted nature.

We, like the Hulk, have flaws. What makes us a hero is moving on despite those flaws. Fighting for and defending what is important to us shows a strength of character more than it shows a physical strength.

 You are the Hulk: Calm, and collected, and thoughtful, you're an intellectual with an unstoppable rage beast living just under the surface. You're not proud of that rage beast, but you have to appreciate the way it gets things done.

You are Captain America: A natural leader who sets

a good example and never gives up. People defer to your sense of justice and integrity. You do your best to protect others, and nothing upsets you more than someone being a bully.

 You are Superman: You embody a strong sense of morality and selflessness. Goodness is apart of your being, and you are a strong believer that all people are good and deserve a second chance. 

Family Teamwork

Life's not fair. We don't all get what we want, and life is tough. Sometimes it takes everything in us to get through the day. I believe that we were given families to help us through these times. We have mothers to cool our foreheads when we're sick. We have siblings to eat lunch with when we are along. We have spouses to hold our hands and to be our rock amidst the storms of life. I hope that at some point in our life we can be that to someone else. Martina McBride said it best in the following lyrics:

I know that you're afraid and I am, too

But you'll never be alone, I promise you

When you're weak, I'll be strong

When you let go, I'll hold on

When you need to cry, I swear that I'll be there to dry your eyes

When you feel lost and scared to death

Like you can't take one more step

Just take my hand, together we can do it

I'm gonna love you through it.

And when this road gets too long

I'll be the rock you lean on

Just take my hand, together we can do it

I'm gonna love you through it

In our marriages, we create partnerships and as a family we are a team. This team is similar to the Avengers. The Avengers aren't heroes because of their fancy outfits and their cool name. Being a team isn't the important thing, it's the teamwork. Perhaps the most important part of that word is the second half: work.

So many blessings come from working together as families. It, "provides endless opportunities to recognize and fill others' needs. It thus teaches us to love and serve one another, inviting us to be like Jesust Christ" (Hawkins et al). An ideal life is not free of work. We have jobs to go to, houses to clean, meals to cook, and children to raise. "Adam and Eve found joy in leving the garden to face the labors of life... [and] by doing so could they grow toward godhead" (Hawkins et al).

But can such work be fun? The answer is a resounding "Yes!" Some of my favorite memories from my childhood are of the times we worked together as a family. Whether it was raking the garden, mowing the yard, or moving rocks, the job seemed less difficult because I was working with my family.  Working together provides "daily opportunities for parents to teach while working alongside their children" and allows family members "to bond while they work together to serve the family" (Hawkins et al). 

Each member of the family is needed in family work. A team cannot fuction if it is missing a member. The Avengers can't save the day without Captain America leading the way. Children must learn to take responsibility for their chores, mothers set the role for housework, and fathers set the standard for participation in family work.

Sources:

Hawkins, A., Dollahite, D., & Draper, T. (2012). The Meanings and Blessings of Family Work. In Successful Marriages and Families: Proclamation Principles and Research Perspectives. Provo, Utah: BYU Studies and School of Family Life, Brigham Young University.

Isaacs, S., Yeary, J., Hayslip, B. (2001). I’m Gonna Love You Through It [Recorded by Martina McBride]. On Eleven [cd]. Nashville, Tennessee: Republic Nashville

Forgiveness in Families

Forgiveness is a topic where following it is much easier said than done. How many of us struggle to forgive someone for what they've done? Often the damage can't be undone with a simple "I'm sorry." Forgiveness isn't easy, but it is so worth it! The Family: A Proclamation to the World states, "successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of... repentance [and] forgiveness."

Let's use the relationship of Thor and Loki as an example (please note that I am using their story from The Avengers  and both Thor movies rather than the comic book stories). 

Thor and Loki grew up together as brother, but as their father, Odin, praised and spoiled Thor, Loki became resentful. Loki became bitter and began to find ways to gain favor in his father's eyes by making Thor look bad. When Thor is banished to Earth for his careless (and pretty much stupid) ways, his brother Loki sees this as an opportunity to take over the throne of Asgard.

This begins Loki's plan to kill Thor, and possibly destroy earth if necessary. However, Thor defeats the warrior Lokie sends after him and Thor returns to Asgard to confront Loki. Thor arrives and fights Loki before destroying the Bifröst Bridge to stop Loki's plan, stranding himself in Asgard. Odin arrives and prevents the brothers from falling into the hole created by the bridge's destruction, but Loki allows himself to fall when Odin rejects his pleas for approval.

Loki and Thor do not get the chance to mend their relationship until after Thor has joined the Avengers and Loki decides to try to take over Earth and become its ruler. Again, brother is pitted against brother. After the Avengers work together and save Earth from destruction, Thor takes Loki back to Asgard to be dealt with, rather than leaving his treatment up to S.H.I.E.L.D.

Later, and evil "god" Malekith, awakened by the release of the Aether attacks Asgard. During the battle, Malekith and Algrim search for Jane, sensing that she contains the Aether. Thor's mother Frigga is killed protecting Jane (Thor's girlfriend). Thor enlists the help of Loki, who knows of a secret portal to Svartalfheim, where they will use Jane to lure and confront Malekith, away from Asgard. In return, Thor promises Loki vengeance on Malekith for killing their mother. Thor's humility in asking for Loki's help is the first step allowing their relationship to be mended.

The first step in forgiving someone, is to recall the hurt. Usually we try to ignore the hurt, but "in order to forgive, we have to be clear about the wrongdoing and acknowledge the injury" (Hawkins et al). Thor could no longer pretend that Loki's actions had hurt him. Next, Thor had to empathize with Loki. He needed to see the world through his eyes. Thor couldn't truly forgive Loki without understanding Loki's feelings and reasoning. The next step was for Thor to offer forgiveness. After Thor released Loki from prison, he worked hard to be there for his brother and to give him a second chance.  He committed to publicly forgive Loki before his friends and fellow warriors.

Perhaps the most important step in the forgiveness process is to hold on to forgiveness. People need to "move forward with one's life instead of revisiting the transgression committed agains him or her.

I leave with you these words, "Is there someone in your life who perhaps needs forgiveness? Is there someone in your home, someone in your family, someone in your neighborhood who has done an unjust or an unkind or an unchristian thing? All of us are guilty of such transgressions, so there surely must be someone who yet needs your forgiveness" (Holland).

Sources:

Hawkins, A., Dollahite, D., & Draper, T. (2012). Repentance and Forgiveness in Family Life. In Successful Marriages and Families: Proclamation Principles and Research Perspectives. Provo, Utah: BYU Studies and School of Family Life, Brigham Young University.

Holland, J. (2008, December 1). Amazed at the Love Jesus Offers Me - Liahona Dec. 2008 - Liahona. Retrieved November 9, 2015, from https://www.lds.org/liahona/2008/12/amazed-at-the-love-jesus-offers-me?lang=eng

The Family: A Proclamation to the World. (1995, September 23). Retrieved October 29, 2015, from https://www.lds.org/topics/family-proclamation