Equal Partnership: The Incredibles

When I think of a successful family unit, I think of the Incredibles. Just like any family, they have their problems and disagreements. However, they work through them together and that makes all the difference. “The secret of a happy marriage is to serve God and each other. The goal of marriage is unity and oneness, as well as self-development” (Benson).

“Equal partnerships are not made in heaven—they are made on earth, one choice at a time, one conversation at a time, one threshold crossing at a time. And getting there is hard work” (Hafen). In today's world, equal partnerships in marriage are not as supported as they should be. Christ's restored church declares that marriage is an equal partnership both here on earth and forever in the eternities, this belief is not common even among different Christian denominations (Hawkins et al).

As Latter-Day Heroes and defenders of the family, it is our duty to stand up for the equality in marriage relationships. “This generation will be called upon to defend the doctrine of the family as never before. If they don’t know the doctrine, they can’t defend it” (Beck). I hope that this post will help you to understand the doctrine of equal partnerships in marriage so that you are able to defend the family.

What does an equal partnership entail? Being equal does not mean being identical, but rather it means having the same value. For example, no two oxen are the same, one may be brown with spots and the other may be black. They could both be different ages. What is important is that they pull their load together. Their value as draft animals is the same, and therefore they can share the yoke and each pull the load together. One does not pull the right half and the other the left, instead the weight is equally shared between them. It is the same with marriage, we share the load with our spouse and the job gets done.

However, that does not mean that in a marriage everything is equal. It isn't doing your half of the dishes and making your half of the bed. Husbands and wives play different roles.

The Roles of  Wives and Mothers:

“Rearing happy, peaceful children is no easy challenge in today’s world, but it can be done, and it is being done. Responsible parenthood is the key. Above all else, children need to know and feel they are loved, wanted, and appreciated. They need to be assured of that often. Obviously, this is a role parents should fill, and most often the mother can do it best" (Benson). Mothers are in my opinion the most underrated people on the planet. They do so much to shape their children and provide them with their needs. Neal A. Maxwell stated, "what happens in cradles and kitchens will prove to be more effective than what goes on in Congress".

Personally, my mother has had more of an impact on my life than any other person. She encourages me to reach my full potential and to never give up. I know that I can always turn to her for advice and love. I believe that a special and sacred bond exists between a mother and her children.

The Roles of Husbands and Fathers:

In John 5:19 we read, "The Son can do nothing of himself, but what he seeth the Father do: for what things soever he doeth, these also doeth the Son likewise." Fathers are examples to their children. It is through the example of their actions rather than their words that children grow and learn. The Family: A Proclamation states, "By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families... In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners." 

D- Dedicated

A- and

D- Devoted

Blessings of Working as Equal Partners:

No matter the differences between spouses, obtaining an equal partnership is not unattainable. In fact, "research has demonstrated that couples who have an equal partnership have happier relationships, better individul well-being, more effective parenting practices, and better-functioning children" (Hawkins et al).  Not only will working as equals bless our relationship with our spouse, it will strengthen the family unit as a whole, allowing the children to prosper as well. 

Sources:

Beck, J. (2011, March 1). Teaching the Doctrine of the Family. Retrieved October 5, 2015, from https://www.lds.org/ensign/2011/03/teaching-the-doctrine-of-the-family?lang=eng

Benson, E. (1992, July 1). Salvation-A Family Affair. Retrieved October 5, 2015, from https://www.lds.org/ensign/1992/07/salvation-a-family-affair?lang=eng

Hafen, B. (2007, August 1). Crossing Thresholds and Becoming Equal Partners. Retrieved October 12, 2015, from https://www.lds.org/ensign/2007/08/crossing-thresholds-and-becoming-equal-partners?lang=eng

Hawkins, A., Dollahite, D., & Draper, T. (2012). Equal Partnership between Men and Women in Families. In Successful Marriages and Families: Proclamation Principles and Research Perspectives. Provo, Utah: BYU Studies and School of Family Life, Brigham Young University.